Don’t bother running… you’ll only die tired
Category: Military
The Department of Defense’s Twelve Days of Christmas
The President has authorized the Department of Defense to assist Santa with the Twelve Days of Christmas. Status of acquisitions follows: Day 1- Partridge in a pear tree: The Army …
Everything I Ever Needed to Know About Life, I Learned as a Helicopter Crewman in Vietnam
by Bobby McBride Crew Chief 128th Assault Helicopter Company Phu Loi, RVN 3/69 – 3/70 NEVER FORGET! Once you are in the fight, it is way too late to wonder …
The New Call for Fire Procedure for the Army
Picture troops under fire, desperately needing artillery support, making a cellphone call and hearing the following: Thank you for calling the 25th Infantry Division’s automated artillery support request line. Please …
U.S. Armed Forces Voice Mail Message
Thank you for calling the United States Armed Forces. I’m sorry, but all of our units are out at the moment, or are otherwise engaged. Please leave a detailed message …
Rules for Dating a Drill Instructors Daughter
Rule One If you pull into my driveway and honk you’d better be delivering a package, because you’re sure not picking anything up. Rule Two You do not touch my …
The 15 Commandments of Operational Security
I. Thou shalt not park thy helicopter in the open, for it bringeth the rain of steel. II. Thou shalt not expose thy shiny mess gear, for it bringeth unwanted …
McDonnel Douglas Warranty Registration Card
Thank you for purchasing a McDonnell Douglas military aircraft. In order to protect your new investment, please take a few moments to fill out the warranty registration card below. Answering …
Murphy’s Laws of Armor
Just after you report “Redcon 1” (Readiness Condition 1 – ready to move out right “now”) for your qualification run, you will realize that you desperately need to take a …
The Rules of Combat
Murphy’s Rules of Combat Friendly fire – isn’t. Recoilless rifles – aren’t. Suppressive fires – won’t. You are not Superman; Marines and fighter pilots take note. A sucking chest wound …
Air Force Dictionary
Blamestorming – Sitting around the squadron discussing why a suspense was missed or a mission failed and who was responsible. Seagull Colonel – A colonel who swoops in, makes a …
Military Rules for Non-Military Personnel
Dear Civilians, We know that the current state of affairs in our great nation have many civilians up in arms and excited to join the military. For those of you …